“Why is there always so much chaos in my home? It’s always a battle to get my kids to do anything, and I’m constantly frustrated with them…”
Our children are the most cherished people in our lives, second only to our spouses. If that’s truly the case, then why is there always so much tension in our homes?
There are a variety of different factors that can contribute to this type of chaos, but the struggles I see most often are parents’ lack of time and energy.
I am reminded daily of what a gift it is to live in such an amazing society. With all of our advancements in technology and medicine, we have the freedom to do most anything we want with our time. The downside to that, unfortunately, is that we tend to become busy and pile on more and more responsibilities and time commitments than is healthy, which results in tensions and exhaustion. Inevitably, our children pick up on this and often act out in defiance, hostilities, depression, etc.
Many parents are consumed by their careers, children’s schooling, extracurricular activities, and volunteer opportunities. By the time we are home and engaged with our children we are already exhausted and only have a small amount of time to manage the household responsibilities. This is a recipe for disaster and results in a vicious cycle often ending with everyone in the home upset with one another. A couple of isolated events like this would be frustrating, but manageable, however, living through this day in and day out results in significant damage to your relationship with each other and deep rooted resentments that are often never mended.
What would it take for you to remove just one thing from your plate to allow yourself some free time during the day solely for enjoying each other’s company?
Is it possible for you to find 45 minutes in a day where you can lay aside everything else and just have fun with your family?
Nick Hersey, LAMFT, LAPC
NHersey @ growcounseling.com
Photo Cred: Yogendra Joshi