Category Archives: Step-Families

Information about step-families

The Perfectionist Child

The Perfectionist Child

A little perfectionist likes order, rules, and thrives on certainty. Perfectionism can start at an early age and when parents or caregivers give these children the support they need, they will thrive. However, it can be challenging to teach young children how to to deal with the inevitable reality that not everything can be achieved with perfection.

So what does perfectionism in children look like and how can you help them?

Here are just a few perfectionistic characteristics you might see in children:

  • Focusing on mistakes rather than successes
  • Low self esteem, depression, anxiety and anger
  • Being overly cautious
  • Believing there is only one right way to do a task
  • Their inability to tolerate mistakes makes them less likely to try new things or take creative risks

How You Can Help:

  • Model acceptance of mistakes and constructive coping skills.
  • Offer patience and understanding.
  • Assist in modifying or adjusting their internal standards.
  • Teach them to break tasks into chunks and encourage them to take one piece at time.
  • Remind them that you love them unconditionally.
  • Teach them that mistakes and failures are normal and essential steps in the learning process.

If you notice that your child’s perfectionism is really interfering with their happiness, social and emotional development in addition to physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, sleep problems, unrelenting anger and tantrums, or difficulty at school, it’s time to seek help professional help.

Michelle Rathburn, MSMFT
mrathburn@growcounseling.com

Blended Family: Tips for Surviving the Holiday Season

Blended Family: Tips for Surviving the Holiday Season

If you are in a blended family, the holidays may seem like the most difficult time of the year rather than the most wonderful.  Splitting time between more than one household is can be stressful. Time always seems too short. You can’t please everyone or feel like you always draw the short straw. Here are…

What Does Emotional Intelligence Mean? Part 1

What Does Emotional Intelligence Mean? Part 1

Children experience the same emotions as adults. They can feel everything from happiness to sadness to anger to nervousness to even stress. However unlike adults, many children do not understand how to effectively deal with the range of emotions they experience. Just like other life skills parents pass onto their children, it is also important…

How to Negotiate Where to Spend the Holidays as a Newly Married Couple

How to Negotiate Where to Spend the Holidays as a Newly Married Couple

Wondering where to spend the holidays as a newly married couple? As the song goes, “Over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house we go.” The question this year is, “To which Grandmother’s house to go?” One discussion I encourage pre-marriage and newly married couples to have, especially this time of year, is how…

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